The Heat of Summer

Well we're in the heat of summer now. I think anything over 80 degrees is gross, so yeah, I'm ready for summer to be done haha. ;)

It's been a super busy month!

We had a family reunion of sorts in Arizona. We got to see Josh's grandpa, dad, aunt, siblings, cousins, and any other relatives I'm forgetting at the moment, and it was a lot of fun! The twins did NOT like the drive, so that part was... well, it's over now. But they LOVED staying in a hotel, seeing family so much, swimming, and getting way more interaction and stimulation than they do when we're just at home. And they even did great sleeping in the hotel, which I was pretty nervous about! So, success. We all had a great time. :)

During the drive back to Utah we made a spontaneous decision to make a stop at the Grand Canyon. It was kind of on the way, neither of us had been before, and we had never had such a great opportunity to go. It set us back quite a bit getting home, and that drive sucked, but it was totally worth it. You guys, every picture I took looked so lame compared to the view I took in in person. Seriously, every time I took a picture I'd tell Josh, "these all look so lame compared to real life!" I get it now. I totally do.

Nevertheless, I DO have a few pictures to share, so here we go. ;)

We also got to see my brother, sister-in-law, and a few of their kids. It was brief, but so fun! :)

The twins had their very first dentist appointment in June too! The office we went to was pretty great, very kid-friendly, and the hygienists even made balloon animals for them to take home! How awesome is that?

Truthfully though, I think their favorite part was seeing "Dory" in the fish tank in the waiting room. Haha!

On the Fourth of July we went to a community barbecue hosted by the LGBTQ community in Provo, which was pretty fun! We got stickers, flags, played with beach balls, and most importantly, got free food. ;) AND, that night the Stadium of Fire didn't even wake up the twins! All in all, a great Fourth of July.

Besides that, I've been cramming in play dates for the summer to enjoy the outdoors, let the twins play with their favorite friend, and to hang out with my best mom friend - I'm going to be *devastated* when they move next month, so I try not to think about it too much and we're just packing in the play time while we can.

The twins love staying busy, and it's probably good for us too. We can hardly keep up with their energy... and their emotions. Just saying. Good thing they're so cute though. ;)

And now... the heatiest heat of summer. We'll try to stay busy, but it's harder to be outside much unless there's water. I saw this meme the other day, and it's literally how it has felt, haha.

On that note, I'm out.

Love,

Ashley

Summer Is Here

I haven't posted since the new year, but oh well! Summer is officially here, and I'm sad because I no longer like the heat. BUT, I'm trying to take advantage of the twins playing outside, because they LOVE being outside and it's probably good for me once in a while too. ;)

Earlier this month I visited my little sister Chanelle and her husband Brooks, and got to see their baby girl finally - it's still crazy to me that my baby sister had a baby! Josh was amazing and took care of the twins for the better part of four days while I had a fun getaway! Thanks Josh! We hung out, watched TV, played Pokemon Trading Card Game Online, and held the cutest little baby girl ^_^

A couple weeks later, my cousin got married and I got to see some of my family as they came into town for the wedding (everything was gorgeous!). It was so fun to see my parents and a handful of my siblings, I just wish I could've seen them for longer!

Jacob also tried Virtual Reality for the first time, and it was the most adorable thing ever! <3

My brother Cody, his wife Miranda, and their baby boy moved back to Utah and we got to visit them earlier this week! It was really fun to see them and see how much their little man has grown! And the twins loved playing outside. :)

We've also loved having play dates and overall we're just trying to get out and have fun!

And of course, having fun can be oh-so-tiring.

Life marches on, and we're trying to make our path. Josh is applying for jobs, I'm working my job, and we're taking one day at a time. Bring on the summer fun!


Love,
Ashley

Goodbye 2017

As the year ends and we move into 2018, I just hope that it's a better year for us.

As I stated in a Facebook post today:

"What's on my mind this New Year's Eve?

It's been a long year. And a hard year. There will always be hard things in every year, but... man this year felt rough. I'm definitely in the camps of "Good riddance 2017" and "2018 NEEDS to be a better year or I can't take it."

Sometimes it's hard for me not to dwell on the negatives and feel jealous of others or sorry for myself, but that's one of the things I'm working on. Being grateful for the good things. Finding happy things amidst the hard.

Because there ARE happy things.

Some of the most obvious happy things in my life are, of course, our twins. They take an awful lot of our energy and patience, but at the end of the day, they are the ones that keep me going. I mean... look at those faces.

Anyway, however your year has been, whatever you're looking forward to in the new year, I hope it's a good one. That's my hope for myself, for my family, and for everyone."


With that being said, I would like to share recent pictures of our lives to close up the year.

We visited my sister and brother-in-law (Chanelle and Brooks) in Idaho for Thanksgiving:

We went and saw the Christmas lights in Downtown Provo:

I got a major hair cut:

We saw a musical of A Christmas Carol:

We played in the first decent snow of the year (giving us a white Christmas!):

And enjoyed these cute faces:

And with that, I'm out! Goodbye 2017, make way for 2018!

Love,
Ashley

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Walking By Faith

Our day-to-day lives over the last several months have been relatively the same. Not a lot of excitement, other than the daily antics of toddler twins. ;)

However, our lives overall recently have been... interesting.

After another difficult school semester (last Fall) for Josh mental-health-wise, lots of prayer, counseling with our parents, and discussion with each other, we decided to pull Josh out of school indefinitely. It just hasn't been good for him and is not the direction we feel he needs to be headed. So after Christmas break, he withdrew from school and started focusing more on building his production company, Southampton Productions. He's been working on it ever since, doing podcasts, photo shoots, etc. He can tell you more about it than I can. ;)

I also decided at that time that I would focus on my goal of becoming a certified lactation consultant. I started reaching out to all the connections I could find, applying for jobs, and doing everything I could to make it happen. But it can be a complicated process, and I was met with dead end after dead end. After a lot of tears and frustration, I determined maybe now just isn't the time, even if it seems like it ought to be. I am hoping to be able to pursue it further in a few years.

After determining that, I decided I should go back into the work force anyway in the meantime, as it would mean a lot better of a financial position for us. I have been working part-time as a virtual assistant for a friend of mine who is a professional blogger, which is a great thing for me because it provides some income and allows me to work from home on my own schedule. But getting a job outside of the home would be that much better. Again, I applied for several jobs that I was rejected from. Finally, though, I got a job offer. Finally, after months of trying to find the employment that I needed, there it was. At least, I thought it was what I needed, and what our family needed.

When that job offer came, however, I got this overwhelmingly terrible feeling. At first, I wasn't sure if it was for feeling guilty that I would leave Josh at home with twin toddlers full-time while he was trying to build his production company, or that I would be away from my twins so much. Because, really, I don't do very well with big changes. But I had been looking forward to starting a new job for months. Shouldn't I feel a little excited about it, even if I was conflicted? But I just had this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. So I was stressed about the situation and confused about what I was supposed to be doing.

The job would be starting in just a few days, so any decision we were going to make about it ideally should be made before then. We prayed, we talked about it, we pondered, I cried, I got Priesthood blessings, I cried about it some more, we talked about it some more, etc... you get the picture. It was a very intense couple of days, emotionally and spiritually. But by the end of it, I felt strongly that my place right now is at home. Rationally, it allows for me to be available to be there for Josh and take care of the twins when he's having a particularly bad day of depression or anxiety (we're focusing on getting his mental health under better control right now, which is a whole different story). It also allows Josh more time and freedom to work on building up his company. But more importantly, it felt right for me to be there. Right for me, and for our family.

The blessing is that we have relative freedom to make that decision right now. We have some flexibility because of assistance we receive financially. We don't normally broadcast it but we're not ashamed of it either. We absolutely want to be financially independent eventually, and I hope that the choices we make right now are setting us up for a more secure future. This means that for now our financial situation is tight, but I am so grateful that we do have the help and resources we need right now. It also may not be seen by many as the right decision, as it means that we will continue to receive assistance for now when we could be otherwise earning more ourselves in the workforce instead, but it is the right decision for us, regardless of how that decision appears to society.



With everything that has been going on lately, our future is very clouded and uncertain. I have no idea what the next year will bring, let alone the next five or ten years. I really wish it wasn't that way, because I would love to know a little more of what the future holds and feel like we have some security. But I believe with all my heart that if we are trying to do our best for ourselves and for our family, Heavenly Father will help us get there. It may be a rocky path, but I have faith that if we are trying to do the right thing the best way that we know how... things will work out. One way or another, things will work out.

Love,
Ashley

The Twins' First Trip to the Aquarium

For Christmas we got passes to the Living Planet Aquarium in Draper. Then we all got sick after Christmas break, and then sick again, but we were finally able to go a couple of weeks ago! It was the twins' first time and they loved it!!

We tried to capture some moments with pictures...

Some bigger kids next to Lauren were kneeling down to look at a lizard in this exhibit, and Lauren copied them even though it made her not be able to see at all! So cute!

And we tried to capture other moments with videos:
(If the videos don't work for you, check them out here and here)

They loved looking at all the fish, the colors, and especially the other kids, haha! They would have been happy to just wander off and explore without us. And they were NOT happy to leave - guess we'll have to visit often while we have these passes! :)

Love,

Ashley